What I See

I was excited and honoured to be invited to take part in the What I See project, a female empowerment initiative that aims to explore how women perceive and express themselves.

Readers of my blog will know that healthy body image and positive self perception are issues close to my heart. Having struggled with eating disorders and body dysmorphia, I started this blog as part of my own recovery to encourage and promote positive body image among women and to raise the profile of sport as a route to a healthy mind as well as a healthy body. The chance to reach a wider platform on issues so important to me was a wonderful opportunity to have and I’d urge you all to get involved with the project in one way or another.

The premise is very simple - one question. What do you see when you look in the mirror? The interpretation of this question is up to you. 100 top female UK bloggers from a huge variety of fields (literature, sports, science to name a few) were invited to film their answers and spearhead what aims to be a global project relative to women all over the world and I was very honoured to me amongst them. I went to the filming day rather unprepared and, being very inexperienced in front of a camera, can’t exactly remember what I babbled and thought of thousands of things to say once I’d left. So, I’d like to talk about it at more length on here.

I don’t think I’m alone in struggling with what I see in my reflection. It’s an all too common trait of women (and of more men than would admit to it) to overanalyse themselves and be overly critical of what they see. For a good couple of years, the first thing I would do in the morning would be check the mirror. From the front, from the side. The routine was always the same. Face forwards, pinching my skin to see how much excess I had. Then would come the tape measure, then the scales. I’d frown at myself every morning and every night, seeing nothing more than an expanse of skin and all the changes I needed to make to stop being such a hideous fat mess.

Today, I don’t act like this. I don’t hate my body, over analyse it, berate it, abuse it. Through fitness I have discovered just how incredible my body is, and all the amazing things it will allow me to do. I will honestly say that sport saved me. I’ve gone in to details before, so I won’t repeat myself, but do read back if you’re a new reader. My body is now my greatest asset and something that never fails to surprise me. Look after it, nourish it - it’s the only one you have! In my recovery I have run nine half marathons, a full marathon and completed a triathlon with a broken elbow. I can lift my own body weight. I can kill off speedy boys on the track. I fully believe I can do anything I put my mind to (learning to swim in seven weeks, training for a marathon in 9 weeks!) and my body will let me go there, provided I treat it properly and give it the respect it deserves. Eat properly. Rest well. But above all, use it to it’s full potential.

There’ll come a day when your body won’t be able to do the things it can now. Use it while you can. Push it. Explore it. See what it’s truly capable of. Run around, jump, skip. Take a hike over a beautiful mountain to see the view. Run along the coast and breathe in the sea air, paddle in the water and dive off the pier. Complete a marathon, a half marathon, a 10k, a 5k - whatever! Swim in open water. Ride a bike so fast your legs burn and you can’t breathe. Life is short - do not let insecurity or uncertainty get in your way. Your body a beautiful machine. Take care of it, nourish it, love it, use it. Because once it’s gone you’ll never get it back.

I’m proud to say that my reflection is now live on the What I See Project site, alongside 99 other inspirational women. Do go over and take a look at the videos - there’s some amazing women. If you’re inspired, you can also upload your own video on the Project site. Following me today is Kat Austen, so do go over and check out her blog and her reflection too.

Thank you so much to Jaclyn and the What I See team for inviting me to take part in this project.